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Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Maggie Lizer

Name: Maggie Lizer
Occupation: Orange County Prosecuting Attorney
Fraudulent Physical Impairments: Blindness (irreversible case of ocular retinoblastoma), Pregnancy
Reason for Fake Blindness: Pass the LSATs, discount on pizzas
Portrayed by: Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Maggie Lizer Quotes:
  • "I'm blind!"
  • " Well, I can’t see anybody ever."
  • "For the pizza guy. I give him a five, I tell him to keep the change."
  • "Well, it’s like the Ten Commandments say, you know? “Be true to thine own self, and to thine own self...”
  • " I’m Maggie Lizer. As in 'Maggie lies her ass off.' One person laughed at that once, and I don’t know why I keep trying it."

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